Hello work, I’ll be right with you.
I just found the perfect all-around excuse for anything. Anything at all that you need a quick-fix way out of. Any trouble you get in to, all you have to do is utter this phrase and people will be forced to say “Oh really? Well it’s ok then”. What is that magical phrase you ask? All you have to say is…. “I have Adult A.D.D”. Thats it. Not that magical, but I foresee this becoming a very important part of my life. I dont have Adult A.D.D per say, but I want it. When someone says to me “Aaron, why were you 45 minutes late for that meeting”, I wanna be able to say “Lets go get ice cream”. Then when I get a cockeyed look like “what the hell just happened here?”, I can say “Sorry, Adult ADD”. Or how about “Aaron, why didnt you hand in your homework?” I’ll just say “Dude, I dont even know what your talking about. Did I just see mouse?”
I know Adult ADD is not something to laugh at, but what made me think of it was this ridiculous commerical I saw for some break-through medication to help ppl with Adult ADD focus better. How can I say this? Uhhhh NO! I would love to be so absent minded about work that I would need a pill just to concentrate long enough to accomplish a simple task. I wouldnt take my pill on purpose. I want to sit there and day dream. I definately dont WANT to do work so leave me alone. What I got a real kick out of was the side effects of this new med. Just in order to concentrate a little better the following may occur: Headaches, nausea, insomnia, abdominal pain, dizziness….should I continue? OK…vomiting, loss of appetite, coughing, tract infections, high blood pressue and my personal favorite…DRUG DEPENDENCE!!! All this for a little concentration? If you think you may have Adult ADD, my advice would be to let it ride cuz I think I would much rather be a little distant in my head than having any one of the side effects. Sure the meds might help you concentrate and read a menu but you but you will be in the bathroom before you can even enjoy what you order. No thanks. Now wheres my kite?
Hope all is well with everyone. Sorry I havent written anything lately. I hope this one comes across and comical for you. So my question now is…What would be a perk to having Adult ADD? Personally I dont think its even real. I think its the equivilant of a “hallmark holiday”. This is a “Drug company Disease”. They are psyching ppl into thinking they are having issues with concentration when the bottom line is…WE ARE LAZY!!!
