Being Aaron Michael

What up everyone?  Here is another installment of quotes from all the ppl that I surround myself with in order for me to crack a smile each day.  We got some new ppl involved on this one.  Welcome Alicia, Shannon, Matt H, and Andrea.  Then there are the stand contributors such as Obi, Cory, Tim, and Ben.  I know for a fact that I left a lot of funny stuff out but I still think this is a strong list of quotes.  If anything funny has happened to you leave in the comments.  Take care and enjoy!  Let the games begin…

probigeorge11: fucking hotmail is slower than my digestive system right now so calm the fuck down

Alicia: lol, get this he’s a professional boy scout

me: he prolly touches his “troops”

ben: where’s pat

me: whoring out free cd’s

ben: thata boy!

“im not gonna believe it till i see the nuts” - alan (on the fact that they just found out their baby is a boy)

me - we got a thunder storm like an hour ago.

obi - ill give ya a fucking thunder storm.

me - I downloaded like 20 Beatles cds last night.

obi - THATS RIDICULOUS!  Now I definately think your gay.

“it’s like, ppl see my ponytail and they automatically think…Loser” - Ben

“I guarantee he is the type of person to pick his nose and eat it.” - Tim

“shutup, just dont speak please” - Obi

“I was home alone, I got kinda scared” - Cory

some girl to ben - “you look good, have you been working out?”

ben - “nope”

“I am gonna go and buy a cubicle.  I want to make myself a real home office” - me

“50,000 rollerbladers.  Thats bullshit” - Jon

me - “i am gonna be in town this weekend, but I’m not sure if I’ll be in friday or saturday”

obi - “well if you dont know now, dont even bother coming in…asshole”

me - “are we going to Busty’s this weekend?”

obi - “I dont know.  I really am not in the mood for seeing skanky girls dance.  If I wanted to do that I’d go to Youngers.  At least I could sleep with the girls there.”

“Erie county can fix the budget…Niagara County isn’t gonna just stop being a long rambling sprawl anytime soon” - Shannon AKA DrRadical.

“Oh great…sports are on” - Matt H.  This was the loudest I have laughed in a long time.  It is just funny to hear a guy say that he is disappointed that sports are on.  Too bad their cant be a network just for him that plays The West Wing 24/7.  Matt watch out the Yankees are on!

me - “we can just listen to the bands at Warped Tour”

Andrea - “can we shove each other into stuff too?”

“I just got done doing my little model workout” - Cory Blake

me - How did the (model) interview go?

Cory - Ehh They arent looking for “my look” right now.

me - So that means they already have a “version” of you?

Just because there a lot of dumb ass ppl in the world today does not mean that we all have to be treated like invalids.  I wish i could protest to the stupidity but I have a sneaky suspicion that it would hold no avail.  This week I am in Syracuse NY for work (I could write another blog just about that), and they put me in a pretty nice hotel.  For whatever reason I noticed a hair dryer being stored on a shelf above the toilet and beside the shower (notice both contain water).  I dont even think twice about this until I see a huge tag hanging off the cord that reads the following message:

DO NOT REMOVE THIS TAG - RISK OF DEATH BY ELECTRIC SHOCK

Read that a few times and let it sink in.  You would arrive at the same conclusion that I did.  NO SHIT!  But not too fast because there are a lot of ppl out there that dont know that if you submerge a plugged in hair dryer in water that you will be fried like a brain on drugs (not pot of course).  Why else would they put the tag there.  It’s not like kids can even read until they are 12 or 13 nowadays and by then they have figured out what electric current by sticking a fork into an uncovered light socket (what did you think would happen mom?). 

I love it when random ppl swing by page.  For some reason I got a few new ppl last entry.  But why I am making it be know is there is a blog that you MUST check out.  It is hilarious.  He has a story on there about the “tight-ass” brother on Two and Half Men.  The name of the entry is “Jon Cryer Doesn’t Have an iPod” (you will find it in the archives).  I was literally LOLing.  It was hysterical.  Just like his other entries.  Plus he is a lot better than me at updating his entries.  So when you get a second go visit Pauly D.  Hope everyone is doing well.  This has been a long week.  My brain is a bit burned out (maybe a little pot), that is why the text here appears to be written by a drunk three year old.  Leave Something.

PS - Stephanie - Still have no idea what to do.  I think I need some blog training. 

Well I am back to trying my hand at humor and entertaining anyone who thinks of checking my site.  I have no idea or excuse why nothing has really been funny enough to write about.  Of course there have been many quotes by friends that I have heard as of late but like usual, I forgot them.  So there I was, sitting in the recliner wondering why I all of sudden I stopped finding the “funny side” to certain situations.  When I happened to glance at the TV and it hit me like I used to hit the bottle of prescription pain killers.  An info-mercial.  What timing I thought to myself.  Right when I was desperate for something that could work for a long-awaited topic for the next blog.  My question off the bat is this…Who directs these things?  They make a normal everyday task seem to be like the biggest hassle in the world.  This particular info-mercial showed a kid taking batting practice in the middle of the street while someone pitched to him.  The key to this phrase is “middle of the street”.  What moron would be taking batting practice in the middle of street?  And beyond that, who wouldn’t set up some kind of back stop to stop the ball.  This irks me beyond belief.  Not only should this kid be kept in a locked room but his parents should be his neighbor.  So where is the huge hassle in this scene?  Well right after this no-talent dweeb swings and misses, the ball just rolls and rolls and rolls and rolls down the street and the kid with the below average IQ has to run his energized ass down the road to shag the ball.  If the kid has that much energy just go to the damn ball park and play on a real field.  Insert “as seen as TV” product now.  A genius idea of a ball, on a rope, that wraps around a tree or a post so there is no more shagging.  So not only does this promote complete laziness but also allows bad parents to be even worse by pawning their kids off on a damn rope and ball contraption that is bound to snap and rip some kids eye right out of the socket.  Might as well just get the kid some adderall and some violent video games.  Now he is just one step closer to wearing a trench coat, black eye shadow, and black finger nail polish. 

Well that’s all I got for now.  I am hoping to get back in the flow of writing this every day or every other day.  The problem is now that I work from home I am never out anymore doing stuff.  I have no funny office stories or anything to report.  Unless ppl really wanna hear about my daily trip to Tim Horton’s for the best coffee ever.  I didn’t think so.  I am working on another quote blog and will have that next.  Ohhhh I just saw an info-mercial selling some really sharp knives.  Better jump that on those.  Never know when I have to cut a tin can or tire iron.  Sorry Cutco.