The Great Oh-Eight Depression
With an economy in shambles and the US Dollar plummetting faster than Roger Clemens’ credibility, I have decided to call this year “The Great ‘08 Depression”. Not because of the obvious reasons, but mainly because I am depressed that all of our bills are going up which means less money to spend on drugs and video games. However, yesterday something happened that made me realize how tough others may have it. I was checking out a store, I got my receipt and was about to leave, the cashier started helping the lady behind me and this is what I hear…
worker - “4 dollars in gas?” (I glance over to see who was only buying 4 dollars of gas, it was an older woman, so i felt bad that she couldn’t afford to buy more gas)
woman - “yes, and these too” (she puts down some lotto tickets, i start fumbling with my wallet to delay to see if I heard everything correctly)
When the worker gives the lady her total…of 24 DOLLARS!!! Thats right, 20 dollars in lotto tickets and 4 dollars in gas. I wanted to stick around to see if this woman was gonna pay in all coins or maybe some pop bottles to figure out why she just didn’t get an extra dollar of gas or maybe even an extra lotto ticket, but I thought I should leave because I was starting to appear unnatural.
From there it was clear where her prioritites are, so I started thinking of what the motives behind her priorities could be. This is the best of many scenarios that I could envision to make this make sense…she is in need of a major body organ, she could die any day without it but she doesnt have any money, she buys the 4 dollars of gas because the last place she needs to drive is approximately 23 miles away, she is buying the lotto tickets as a last effort to score big in order to buy whatever organ she needs…Think thats it? Probably not but it kept entertained for quite awhile last night.
I thought maybe I’d walk outside and notice that she was only filling a gas can for her snowblower, and that she would have a fully-gassed Cadillac and she was buying the lotto tickets for charity…but that was not the case.
Any better ideas?
Poor little old lady has no life and never goes anywhere except to the store to buy lotto tickets. She hopes to win big so she can leave the money to her cats and not her ungrateful family who never visit.
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highly readable and, in part, quite entertaining….the website is certainly worth a visit